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Dear Tao X,

Someone stole my favorite pair of socks.

They were blue with kitties on them.

My mother sent me a letter, it said, “Noah X, for a 1000 dollars will you marry the Bishop’s daughter. She is a good woman. She knows how to cook spaghetti and can out drink a Hell’s Angel.”

So I married her the Bishop’s daughter.

She is ugly with moles and saggy boobs.


Saggy Boob!

I knew this dancer, she had big saggy titties, she would bounce them off of men’s heads.


How many pain killers, do you think, it would take to kill me?

< transmissions from noah x to tao x by noah cicero >