HIKIKOMORI

< by ellen kennedy and tao lin >

dear ellen


today i was very afraid. a person knocked on my door and said my name in a voice i didn't recognize. i put my hotplate on top of my computer and i rolled into a fetal position and used my mouth to hold a corner of my blanket and then rolled around my room until the blanket had wrapped around my body. then i used my inner ear to sense my location in my room and rolled very carefully behind my computer. then i slowed my heart rate to 20 beats per minute by thinking about soy beans quietly running through a green field in the sun.

i think my mom hired a 'rental sister.' i read on the internet that 'rental sisters' cost $8000 a year and they come talk to you twice a week. i read on the internet that months can go by before i open my door and more months before i venture out with a 'rental sister' to the park or to the movies. i read that richard yates is currently working as a 'rental sister.' does richard yates' voice sound like a small girl's voice? i hope richard yates is my 'rental sister.' i'm excited.


tao

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