< by ellen kennedy and tao lin >

dear ellen

an ugly fish auditions for a werner herzog movie. at the audition the ugly fish has to say 'i'm going to lick your asses' and then wave a broadsword triumphantly. at home the ugly fish has been repeating the line 'i'm going to lick your asses' for over three hours. the ugly fish tries to tie the twenty pound broadsword to its two pound body. the ugly fish sees the broadsword falling through the air toward him. the ugly fish panics and says 'i'm going to lick your asses.' the broadsword cuts the ugly fish into two sections. an obese woman breaks into the ugly fish's home carrying a bowl of hot nacho cheese. her expression is one of desperation. the obese woman sees the meat on the floor and gets them and dips them in the nacho cheese and eats them. her expression is one of inner calm.


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