Eat When You Feel Sad

15/23 - Next

Robert is lying on his bed. Robert is sweating. Robert looks at his fan. Robert looks out the window at a fenced-in area across the street. Robert looks at his cat. Robert looks out the window. Robert thinks “I can’t have girls over because there is cat hair everywhere and I only like girls that are allergic to cats.” Robert thinks “When I go to girls’ houses I offend them by hating their friends.” Robert feels weird. Robert takes off his clothes and looks out his bedroom window. Robert looks at his clock. It is 9:40 PM. Robert turns on the radio and tries to find the hip hop station. Robert goes to the bathroom and picks up the litter scoop and the grocery bag and uses the litter scoop to move hardened cat shit and piss from the litter box into the grocery bag. Robert takes a piss and looks at his bathroom ceiling, as if for the first time. Robert takes a shower. Robert walks to his bedroom and sits on his bed and puts on socks and puts on underwear and puts on jeans and puts on a t-shirt and then takes off the t-shirt and puts on a collared shirt and then puts on a tie and a tie clip. Robert looks at a glass of water and then drinks from it. Robert is listening to the new Animal Collective album. Robert checks his email. Robert has no new email. Robert looks at his cat and thinks about letting his cat run free. Robert thinks about red wagons. Robert wants to call someone. Robert feels happy that he doesn’t have work tomorrow. Robert thinks “I could quit my job.” Robert punches himself in the chest as hard as he can. Robert puts on other music. Robert calls Lisa and leaves a voicemail. Robert thinks about punching through his screen. Robert punches his pillow. Robert thinks about crying. Robert thinks about having sex. Robert tries to masturbate but fails to maintain an erection. Robert is crying. Robert kicks his fan. Robert holds his foot. Robert is wiping his tears on his sleeve. Robert looks at himself in the mirror. Robert takes off his tie clip. He loosens his tie and undoes his top button. Robert wishes he had beer. Robert takes off all his clothes. Robert lies in his bed for two hours with his eyes closed. Robert puts on shorts and goes downstairs and sits on his stoop. Robert goes inside and pours a glass of water and is careful not to let the cat run away. Robert thinks of different things he could be doing right now. Robert calls Sara and leaves a voicemail. Robert wonders if he’s gay. Robert thinks “I wish I had beer so I could go back to sleep.” Robert isn’t sure what to do. Robert brings a tray of ice cubes to his bedroom and takes off his shorts and lies in bed and places ice cubes on his stomach.